Although it has been over a week since it happened, I have just now began to gather the strength to write about it. Last Friday, I lost my dog Thunder. Now, to everyone who has never owned a dog, and to all the cat people who can handle being alone much better than us dog lovers, you may not be able to understand the full weight of the loss. Losing a dog, or any long-term pet for that matter, is more than just that, it’s losing a part of your life. It’s losing a best friend, a family member, and a companion. I have lost others before, my grandfather, and friends who have died young, but losing Thunder was a type of loss I had never dealt with before. The emotions were new, and they were harsh, and I am not sure if it is something I am equipped to deal with.
I want to say that the day it happened, and the next few were the worst, I cried all day, until I didn’t think I had any left, and then when I had none left, I cried a little more. Every thought made me break down. Even if it was just a split second that it sunk in that he was no longer there, or that he never would be again. Now that some time has past, the feelings have changed, I don’t randomly burst into tears, instead I just carry this overwhelming sadness with me all day. Even when I am not thinking about it at all. That is pretty much where I am at right now, in a sad funk. I’m waiting for it to go away its just not. Its exhausting to do daily things, like eat, or drive anywhere, even be around people. I only have the energy to be around one person at a time right now. I just want to feel better. I loved my dog more than I can express and I will never stop missing him, but I need to lose this horrible feeling before I comfort food myself into a coma. Has any one of you ever lost a pet? I need help with this one…
Missing him more than I can say <3
Rest in Peace Thunder
March 28, 2002-January 11, 2013